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Legends, Loot, & Lore: A Players's Guide to Dungeons and Dragons
"Legends, Loot, & Lore" is a fun Dungeons and Dragons podcast where host Andrew and co-host Catherine dive into the thrilling realms of D&D, delivering news, tips, interviews, and fascinating tales of legendary adventures, all from the perspective of someone new to or interested in playing Dungeons and Dragons.
Legends, Loot, & Lore: A Players's Guide to Dungeons and Dragons
Journey to Agatha's Lair and the Secrets Beyond
We return with camaraderie and dice in hand to explore the evolving world of Phandalin. Our shared passion for Dungeons & Dragons remains a constant as we navigate reclaimed territories and puzzle over the ever-enigmatic cistern. This episode recounts our escapades at Tresendar Manor—now the wonderfully quirky Bemblebomble B&B—complete with heroic rescues and goblin management hiccups. Rediscover the joy of reuniting with friends amidst the chaos of distinguishing allies from foes, all while Theo Pimble and Droop the goblin continue to steal the show.
It's time for character development as we journey back to Phandalin with a strategic twist. Our monk faces the age-old dilemma: Way of the Open Hand or Way of the Four Elements? The choice made unlocks fierce new abilities like Fangs of the Fire Snake and Fist of Unbroken Air, adding a fiery flair to our adventure. Meanwhile, the world of cantrips opens up for our Pact of the Tome caster, with spells like Guidance and Vicious Mockery adding to the mix. From pop culture references to hilarious marketing mishaps, this chapter is a joyous celebration of character progression.
The path ahead brims with mystery and humor as we plot our next steps in Phandalin. Balancing quests like the search for the Banshee Agatha and the elusive Wave Echo Cave, we're kept on our toes by NPC antics and our own humorous attempts at negotiation. Then, it's off to Agatha's lair, where we barter for knowledge with a spectral twist. With tales of musical magic, whimsical wardrobe changes, and an unforgettable journey back to Phandalin, join us for a rollicking ride through fantasy, friendship, and the unpredictable world of role-playing games.
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welcome back everyone finally. Long, long break, long hiatus, welcome back to legends, loot and lore. Yay Woo, so it's been a while. So we, we, we posted the five hour mega episode recently, yeah, but there we had taken a long break. Catherine, would you like to address?
Speaker 2:why we're taking a long break.
Speaker 1:Why we took a long break.
Speaker 2:Yes, we were on a break. Andrew and I are on a permanent break. Yeah, so andrew and I are getting divorced yes, we are but uh still best friends yes, yes, we are all good and definitely still doing podcasts together definitely podcasting together still yeah, definitely co-parenting cats together.
Speaker 1:yes, yes, all five of them, definitely.
Speaker 2:Six now. Well, six now, yes, and definitely still seeing each other pretty regularly.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:So yeah.
Speaker 1:As we navigate this new dynamic in our relationship.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but we've known each other for 22 years. Sure have. I don't think either one of us is getting rid of the other anytime soon.
Speaker 1:No, no, we're not. So in today's episode we have three things to do. We're going to since it's been quite some time since these three have gotten together to play we're going to do a little bit of a recap of what happened in the in the past, Refresh everybody's memory. We have a level up to do of our characters. So I think we're going from level two to level three, if I recall correctly, and then, if time permits, we will get back to the adventure and see what's happening in Phandalin, after you reclaimed the Tresendre Manor, the future home of the Bembo Bombo B&B.
Speaker 2:Oh man, I got to get the Zanros voice back.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you do, yeah, I do. You got to work on that, okay, like butter darling.
Speaker 4:Maybe not that deep. I probably wouldn't be free.
Speaker 2:If you did that, could you imagine if I sounded like that? Now, just rebranding, I'm rebranding Xanros.
Speaker 1:Who is that?
Speaker 4:Somewhere the voice for Xanros changed? Did you see that Maybe Catherine was replaced by a doppelganger?
Speaker 1:That's right.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I'm an alien, I'm just's right. Yeah, I'm an alien, I'm just making shit up. Now I'm an alien.
Speaker 1:You are an alien, I am an alien. That would explain so much. Anyway, yes, so let's go back to the, let's go to a fabulous recap.
Speaker 2:Okay, so I'm going to preface this by saying only one of the three of us has listened to the five hour episode, and it's me, but but all three of you played it.
Speaker 1:So hopefully, hopefully, you have I know right. It was like six months ago, it's been about that long, so so if you recall you were, you were in trisender manor yes I'm sorry, I think you mean the Bumble, bumble, b&b. That's correct.
Speaker 3:They're back, she's back.
Speaker 1:I'm back, baby. So you cleared out so a couple of things. So there was the cistern.
Speaker 2:We were obsessed with the cistern.
Speaker 1:That was.
Speaker 4:It was like my wanted MacGuffin or something like that, I don't know. It's like I know there's a secret here somewhere right, there's got to be something to it. Nobody just has a cistern the secret was there was no secret and now everybody has cisterns, because it's the thing that's right.
Speaker 1:So you made it past the non-magical, ordinary cistern. Thank God, barely, barely made it past that. You went through. You went into the crypt. There were a couple sarcophagi and sarcophagals.
Speaker 2:Sarcophagals.
Speaker 1:There, yep, you rescued the woman and her kids yes and Theo Pimble is, if you recall is, still with you, I think damn it, theo Pimble.
Speaker 2:He is, and now he's with Droop. Which one is Droop? Droop was the, wasn't he a goblin? Droop the goblin wasn't he a goblin, droop the goblin? Wasn't he a?
Speaker 1:goblin. Let's go back to our notes.
Speaker 2:I'm going to my notes Go to the notes Greska's Fresca.
Speaker 4:Yes, it's Fresca, he was a goblin. And now a short interlude from Greska's.
Speaker 2:Fresca, he was a goblin who was in the room with the bugbears, I think, and then he didn't want trouble. So he and Theo Pimble are the ones moving the bodies around and stuff.
Speaker 1:Got it they're dragging the bodies in for Sarnak, sarnak, the Sarlacc.
Speaker 2:It might also be Karnak Karnak the Nothic.
Speaker 4:For some reason, he gives us an answer and we don't know the question yet.
Speaker 3:That's right yeah.
Speaker 5:Kind of got to work on this relationship.
Speaker 1:Oh my.
Speaker 4:God, we're really in trouble if there's ever a shortage of envelopes in family.
Speaker 1:Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 2:We agreed with Sar Sarnak that. Uh, that I know. Now I keep wanting to call him Sarlacc like he's in a Sarlacc pit.
Speaker 4:Yes, um, it's okay. Most days I can't even get my own character's name straight, so it's okay.
Speaker 1:That's fair Um the ever changing Mm Equium or Robbie Equium.
Speaker 3:Arabiana Fabricadabra. Oh, look at.
Speaker 2:Fable, they're so sick of our.
Speaker 1:Fable's not even awake yet, so give them a break. Fable has not woken up.
Speaker 5:They said D&D started at 10.
Speaker 2:I live next door. I set my alarm for 945. Exactly Okay, so we told Sarnak if they're wearing a red cloak.
Speaker 1:Yes, their food, they're edible.
Speaker 2:If they're not wearing a red cloak, they're a guest. Don't eat them Right. We seem to have an understanding with Sarnak. I think Sarnak was really just looking for a friend Sarnak was just lonely. And then I took some wood and some bugbear blood and wrote a few signs indicating the future home of the Bumble.
Speaker 1:Bumble B&B?
Speaker 2:Yes indeed, and that red brands need not apply. And then we decided that we weren't going to go back to the pub. We were going to let the red brands come back to the Chisender Manor and let Sarnak have them if they're that stupid and they probably are. Anything else we did in there? We did not decide where we were going next. We took out Glass Staff. Oh yeah.
Speaker 1:You took out Glass Staff, you took out basically everybody in there that could have provided any sort of valuable information as to where you might want to go next. Oops, just saying.
Speaker 3:Kill first, ask questions later, isn't that?
Speaker 2:why we have a dungeon master. That's right, you get us where we need to go, buddy.
Speaker 1:I am going to railroad you right to the next place. Get us where we need to go, buddy.
Speaker 4:I am going to railroad you right to the next place, having somebody. If we're going to play the way we're playing, maybe what your underlying suggestion is at least have another player that can speak with the dead.
Speaker 1:Speak with dead might be very helpful for a group of murder. Hobos. Absolutely, that should be rule number one.
Speaker 4:Sorry, buddy, that's going to leave a mark. Oh, you're dead. Oh damn, I'm supposed to get directions from this guy. Bring in the wizard.
Speaker 1:It's still the spider right, you're still looking for the spider.
Speaker 2:We're still trying to find what's his name. You know the guy oh, gundren Rockseeker.
Speaker 1:You're still looking for Gundren Rockseeker.
Speaker 2:We have to go back to Sister G Gariel.
Speaker 1:Sister G gave Dal a quest to find somebody. Banshee, yes, the Banshee of Indusheron Woo.
Speaker 2:Fable remembered.
Speaker 1:This episode brought to you by the Banshee, Banshees of Indusheron. Banshees of Indusheron. Really a funny movie actually though Very, very good. Highly recommend it. See a review on the next episode. Yeah, so there's the Banshee. See a review on the next episode. Yeah, so, so there's the Banshee there. There are other places to explore, so I think I'll just, I'll, just, I'll just assume that when you talk to remember Sildar Howlwinter, the guy that you rescued previously, who was staying at the I don't know where, oh, he was at the town hall.
Speaker 1:He was staying in the inn because he was hosting the end, he was staying at the inn.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I always think it's funny how player characters get a night of rest and they can heal up and bing.
Speaker 1:They're like just back to normal.
Speaker 2:But Sildar needs like weeks, player characters get a night of rest and they can heal up.
Speaker 4:Bing. They're like just back to normal, but Sildar needs like weeks. Npcs have a bad health plan?
Speaker 1:They really do, anyway. So you had left Trescender Manor, aka the future home of the Bumble Bumble B&B, had we though? Yeah, you were headed out, you were headed out.
Speaker 2:Well, we were headed out, but we hadn't actually gone anywhere.
Speaker 1:You haven't gone anywhere.
Speaker 4:Passage under Granville yes.
Speaker 1:Correct, yes.
Speaker 4:Being let out.
Speaker 1:Correct. You were directed out through the passageway heading toward the town of Phandalin.
Speaker 4:We followed the enchanted glowing red sign that said exit.
Speaker 1:That's right. So you were heading back to Phandalin after you left the Trescender Manor. So at this point, before we proceed and figure out where we want to go next, we do need to level up your characters.
Speaker 4:Figure out how to do this again. Did we do? Did we start out doing xp or just it's?
Speaker 1:milestone, so you want to. I don't know how to do this, okay did you click it? I did, and now I'm in here okay, okay, hang on, let me go to your character sheet. I made it three.
Speaker 5:Okay.
Speaker 1:So now you go to? Okay. So you went manage, manage character and levels. Yeah, Okay, so you changed it to level three. Yes, so now you'll notice, if you scroll down a little bit, notice how there's one that's highlighted in blue that says monastic tradition.
Speaker 5:I see it.
Speaker 1:That is one of your new features. Oh what are these?
Speaker 2:Did I get anything new?
Speaker 5:I don't think I did.
Speaker 1:Oh, so you have to choose a. Oh, I don't know what these are. We'll work on one at a time. So we'll work on Zanros, so you have to choose. You've got a whole bunch of options here. Now you want to stick with the I think, the expanded rules that's what I was going to go with, so no, I'm sorry, you want to stick with the 2014 core huh core rules.
Speaker 2:Then what is that? Because all I've got in here is it says choose an option, and then it says expanded rules, and then there's an option that says critical role. That's all I've got.
Speaker 1:Oh, you don't have the 2014 core rules in there.
Speaker 2:Interesting. It says way of mercy, way of the ascendant dragon, way of the astral self, way of the drunken master, way of the Kensei, way of the long death, way of the astral self, way of the drunken master, way of the Kensei, way of the long death, way of the sun soul, and then, under critical role, it's way of the cobalt soul Can you scroll at all?
Speaker 1:No, that's strange.
Speaker 2:I don't know what to tell you.
Speaker 1:Because under yours I can see the core, Because there's the way of the shadow, the way of the core.
Speaker 2:Oh, it says. Looking for something not on the list below? Unlock all official options in the marketplace.
Speaker 1:No, you shouldn't have to do that.
Speaker 2:Well, I don't know. You can look at my computer.
Speaker 1:I'm going to look at your computer.
Speaker 2:Okay, oh, they're there. They weren't there before. I swear to you it was not there. It wasn't there. I believe it. It literally went right from expanded rules to critical role. Okay, so I'm doing way of shadow, way of the four elements, or way of the open hand.
Speaker 1:I think you can do the expanded. We'll do the expanded or the core rules.
Speaker 2:This is so many things to look up.
Speaker 1:So try like for me, one of the good ones is way of the open hand.
Speaker 2:Okay, what is that?
Speaker 1:Well, if you click on it, oh does it tell you? It'll give you the explanation.
Speaker 5:It. Well, if you click on it, oh, does it tell you. It'll give you the explanation. It doesn't.
Speaker 1:Yes, but you'll notice it now. You'll see down below it says open hand.
Speaker 2:I see techniques.
Speaker 1:Hand technique.
Speaker 2:Starting when you choose this tradition. At third level, you can manipulate your enemy's ki when you harness your own. Whenever you hit a creature with one of the attacks granted by your flurry of blows, you can impose one of the following effects on that target Must succeed on a dexterity saving throw or be knocked prone. Must make a strength saving throw. If it fails, you can push it up to 15 feet away from you. Can't take reactions until the end of your next turn. Okay.
Speaker 1:And so if you go back up and you pick another one, it'll give you an explanation on that one as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I want to see what the Way of the Four Elements does. Ooh, you get all sorts of options on this.
Speaker 1:I'm going, you're taking which?
Speaker 2:I'm taking the Disciple of the Elements.
Speaker 1:Disciple of the Elements.
Speaker 2:Oh, I'm sorry, it's Way of the Four Elements.
Speaker 1:Way of the Four Ele, way of the four elements. Okay, so you're choosing way of the four elements yep because you're a monk. So that's yes. Let's refresh everybody's memory you're a monk I am a monk, so you're gonna take way of the four elements, and then what are you? What are the sub choices to that?
Speaker 2:okay, so there's the elemental disciplines. You get two choices.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:I am taking fangs of the fire snake when you would use the attack action on your turn. You can spend one key point to cause tendrils of flame to stretch out from your fists and feet. Your reach, with your unarmed strike, increases by 10 feet for that action as well as the rest of the turn. A hit with such an attack deals fire damage instead of bludgeoning damage, and if you spend one key point when the attack hits, it also deals an extra 1d10 fire damage. Wow, I am also taking yes fist of unbroken air. You can create a blast of compressed air that strikes like a mighty fist. As an action, you can spend two key points and choose a creature within 30 feet of you. That creature must make a strength-saving throw. On a failed save, the creature takes 3d10 bludgeoning damage, plus an extra 1d10 bludgeoning damage for each additional key point you spend and you can push the creature up to 20 feet away from you and knock it prone. On a successful save, the creature takes half as much damage and you don't push it or knock it prone.
Speaker 1:Wow, and what's the other thing that you get as part of level three? Is it deflect missiles?
Speaker 5:Hold on, I'm not sure.
Speaker 2:Where do I see that?
Speaker 1:It should be in your list of abilities there.
Speaker 2:Yes, deflect missiles. Starting at third level, you can use your reaction to deflect or catch the missile when you are hit by a ranged weapon attack. When you do so, the damage you take from the attack is reduced by 1d10 plus your dexterity modifier, plus your monk level. If you reduce the damage to zero, you can catch the missile if it is small enough for you to hold in one hand and you have at least one hand free hand and you have at least one hand free. If you catch a missile in this way, you can spend one key point to make a ranged attack with the weapon or piece of ammunition you just caught. As part of the same reaction you can make. You make this attack with proficiency, regardless of your weapon proficiencies, and the missile counts as a monk weapon for the attack, which has a normal range of 20 feet and a long range of 60 feet.
Speaker 1:Wow, right on rock and roll. Okay.
Speaker 2:Nanos is tiny but mighty.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, she is All right. So that's, that's upgrading your character.
Speaker 5:Yep.
Speaker 2:Huzzah.
Speaker 1:All right, let's, let let's level up Equium. So what are you? So? I, so I.
Speaker 4:At third level being a warlock.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 4:I get a packed boon Not Pat Boon, by the way, oh no, pat Boon.
Speaker 1:That'd be amazing. You have a.
Speaker 4:Pat Boon. I summon Pat Boon. That'd be amazing.
Speaker 1:Oh man, you have a Pat Boone. I summon Pat Boone. That'd be amazing.
Speaker 4:Oh man, alternate rules on Legends, lute and Lore, oh God, kind of like you put the $500 in the middle of Monopoly and that sort of thing. Just homebrew rules and you get a Pat Boone as a familiar.
Speaker 1:That'd be fantastic. So, yes, your packed, packed.
Speaker 4:My packed boon.
Speaker 1:Boon.
Speaker 4:So at third level, your otherworldly patron bestows a gift upon you for your loyal service. You gain one of the following features of your choice. You can choose packed of the blade, packed of the chain, packed of the talisman and packed of the blade, pact of the chain, pact of the talisman and pact of the tome. So really, pact of the blade is very good for warlocks overall because you can use your action to create a packed weapon in your empty hand and it takes the form of a melee weapon. Um, or you can transform a magic weapon in your possession into your packed weapon and basically it's kept in an extra dimensional space that you can basically grab it and interesting so that's always very interesting to me because it's one of the um, one of the betters.
Speaker 4:I won't I won't read the whole thing, but the, the pact of the betters.
Speaker 4:I won't read the whole thing, but the Pact of the Chain gives you essentially it gives you a familiar and it doesn't count against your spells known. You cast the spell, you choose one of the normal forms of your familiar or one of the following special forms is an Imp, a Pseudodragon, a Quazit or a Sprite, and you can forego your own action and allow the familiar to take an attack with its reaction. Pact of the Talisman gives you an amulet or talisman that can aid the wearer when the need is great. I'm just giving you the condensed version.
Speaker 4:Or now, this is Pact of the Blade and Pact of the Tome are the ones that interest me the most, because in Pact of the Tome your patron gives you a grimoire called the Book of Shadows. When you gain this feature, you choose three cantrips from any class spell list, a grimoire called the book of shadows. When you gain this feature, you choose three cantrips from any class spell list and they needn't be from the same list. While the book is on your person, you can cast three of those. You can cast those cantrips at will and they do not count against your number of cantrips known, fascinating, excellent so which one did you actually choose, james?
Speaker 1:your number of cantrips known Fascinating, excellent, so which one did you actually choose, james? I don't know yet. You don't know yet.
Speaker 4:Okay, the fairest thing I can say is I don't know yet. No, because as a so Ikum's strength lies in his casting, so giving him three more cantrips to cast pretty amazing. Versus. You know I'm always playing against the strength. So if I'm using a blade, you know your strength is, you know, added into that obviously, and you know I don't want to heal opponents because that's where my strength is an open hand attack is technically healing because it's minus like it's damaging me was that a fly now.
Speaker 4:That's a big fly oh my so my thought is, I'm gonna take extra spells right take the pact of the tome and and acquire the book of shadows, which gives me um now. The interesting thing is now I have to pick three cantrips for right any any class. So um what I will do is I will pick.
Speaker 1:You want to think about that. I'll think about that, you think about that. Let's go to Fable and then we'll review the cantrips that you have chosen. Fabulous Fable, hello. Have chosen. Fabulous fable, hello.
Speaker 5:so have you been thinking about how you're gonna level up dow. I could just be looking at this wrong, but I leveled dow up and I don't have any like third level thing going on unless I'm just not looking at it right.
Speaker 1:So what's your? What class are you? Cleric, you're a cleric, so you get additional spell slots. Okay, it's like, all you get Fun. Okay, so you get the second level spell slots and an additional first level spell slot. That's all you get. Cool, yeah, all right, so you're all set now I'm sorry.
Speaker 5:Yes.
Speaker 1:Awesome, James. Have you figured out your cantrips? Fabulous. What have you chosen?
Speaker 4:I have chosen a little smorgasbord, so guidance. The pact of the tome, so guidance.
Speaker 1:And what does guidance do? Briefly, Guidance.
Speaker 4:You touch one willing creature once before the spell ends. The target can roll a d4 and add that number to one ability check of its choice. It can die before or after making the ability check. The spell then ends fabulous the next will be thaumaturgy. Oh thaumaturgy.
Speaker 1:please, please, please, please, tell us what thaumaturgy is you thaumaturgy, please, please, please, please tell us what thaumaturgy is you manifest a minor wonder within range. Small wonder, do you remember that show?
Speaker 2:That was a great show.
Speaker 4:One of the effects below within range If you cast this spell multiple times, you can have up to three of its one-minute effects.
Speaker 1:Ooh, at a time Fabulous.
Speaker 4:So altered eyes.
Speaker 1:You alter the appearance of your eyes for one minute I'll give you the star trek eyes like that, lit up by like right right, right.
Speaker 4:That's what I'm going for awesome booming voice booming voice up to three times as loud as normal for one minute it gives you advantage on charisma, intimidation checks, uhation checks, fireplay. You cause fire flames to flicker, brighten, dim or change color for one minute. Invisible hand Might be an HR issue. You instantly cause an unlocked door or window to fly open or slam shut. Nice Phantom sound.
Speaker 2:Okay, there, matt Lauer, wow.
Speaker 3:Wow, wow, phantom Sound. Okay there, matt Lauer. Wow, wow, wow.
Speaker 4:I totally get that reference. I'm like oh my god.
Speaker 1:Definitely an HR issue.
Speaker 3:Definitely an HR issue Phantom Sound.
Speaker 4:You create an instantaneous sound that originates From the point of your choice, Definitely an HR Phantom sound. You create an instantaneous sound that originates from the point of your choice within range, such as a rumble of thunder, a cry of a raven or ominous whispers and tremors. You cause harmless tremors in the ground for one minute.
Speaker 1:And because it's Equium.
Speaker 4:Yes, I have chosen Vicious's Equium. Yes, I have chosen Vicious Mockery.
Speaker 5:Nice.
Speaker 1:Fantastic.
Speaker 4:And yeah.
Speaker 1:So, james, in the words of an old, wise man, you have chosen wisely.
Speaker 2:Fable won't get that reference.
Speaker 1:Fable doesn't watch movies.
Speaker 5:You call the dog Indiana.
Speaker 2:Your name is Henry Henry Henry.
Speaker 4:Jones Jr, very dangerous, you go first.
Speaker 2:Indiana Jones.
Speaker 4:Snakes. Why does it have to be snakes?
Speaker 1:He is amazing. Have you watched Shrinking On?
Speaker 3:Apple.
Speaker 1:TV Plus, it's so good.
Speaker 2:Harrison Ford is remarkably funny.
Speaker 1:Harrison Ford is remarkably funny, harrison Ford is very funny.
Speaker 4:There is a interview with him on the Graham Norton show.
Speaker 1:Oh boy, I may have seen it.
Speaker 4:It's Ryan.
Speaker 1:Reynolds Gosling.
Speaker 4:Philadelphia it was definitely Ryan Gosling because it was when they did blade runner 2040.
Speaker 1:Ah, okay.
Speaker 4:And uh, he, he is, he's hilarious. He is, and I think, the only- the only way Harrison Ford is funnier is when Mark Hamill is impersonating Harrison.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, it's even funnier, yeah, cause it's just like yeah absolutely All right. Fantastic. I don't know what's going on over here, so everybody's leveled up. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Fan Fantastic, fan Dalen Fantastic. That was coming, the fantastic, fan Dalen Fantastic. Phandalin Fantastic. I knew that was coming, the Fantastic.
Speaker 2:Phandalin His band, the Fabulous.
Speaker 1:Everything's fantastic in Phandalin. I'm going to write them a jingle. Okay, do you remember the Pompton Lakes Business District?
Speaker 2:I sure do.
Speaker 1:Spend a little and save a lot Anyway.
Speaker 2:They were really trying to make the Pompton lakes the Pompton lakes business district was really trying to be a thing.
Speaker 1:It's better. It's it's way better than than this, than the hack and sack business district. Oh, the sack, the sack, come down to the sack. I'm like that's, that's how you're marketing your shopping district in Hackensack, new Jersey. The sack, come to the sack. Like literally, they had billboards Billboards that said come to the sack, like it was just like. I'm like it was just like they spent money on this and someone greenlit this. That's like the worst thing. Like who was like that's it. That's where the money is right. There, the money's in the sack.
Speaker 1:The money's in the sack. No, the money's in the banana stand.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there's always money in the banana stands. Poor Fable. So many references they're not going to get that one was Arrested Development Alright.
Speaker 1:Are we ready for some adventure? Yes, okay. Adventure awaits let's adventure to the lovely town of Fandale Is that? Is that where you're? I mean, do you want to go back into Fandale? I guess, or what would you like to do?
Speaker 2:We're going to go.
Speaker 4:A lady that ran the. She's the lady that wanted mining. Yeah, she's the lady that wanted the mining yeah uh, but didn't we decide?
Speaker 2:we didn't want to tell her that we killed him oh yeah, we didn't want to tell her, that's right uh, was that halia thornton?
Speaker 4:yes, okay, yeah, but we decided when I start thinking about it, and, ellen, I can only think of harvin western. Yeah, the fact that I just punch him in the face.
Speaker 1:That's me, that's my issue all right, so you're not going to tell Haleah, whatever her name is no, okay, excellent. So as a little bit of a refresher, she was offering you money to capture Glass Staff. We kind of blew that too so and bring any correspondence found in his quarters, Whoops To capture glass staff and and bring any correspondence found in his quarters.
Speaker 5:Whoops.
Speaker 1:Was, it was the request, all right, so so you're not telling Haleah, haleah.
Speaker 5:Hey you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, hey, hey, it's the monkeys, so you're not telling her that that you.
Speaker 4:You're not monkey.
Speaker 1:Fabulous, okay, so a couple things. That's right. He's going to be at the you could find out when the last train to Clarksville is oh my God, and maybe get out of Phandalin Mickey's playing at the Bergen County.
Speaker 5:He's the last remaining monkey.
Speaker 1:Mickey Dolenz Milking it for all it's worth.
Speaker 4:Might as well. So, because he's the only one left, does he have on the marquee? Does it say monkeys? But the S is crossed out.
Speaker 3:Ah, monkey, too soon. Does he like?
Speaker 2:have like on the marquee, does it say monkeys, but the s is crossed out ah monkey, I don't think it's too soon okay, so, okay, so let's, let's, let's talk about this.
Speaker 1:So so you've got, you've got many places to go, you've got your maps of fandale in front of you. So I think staying at the Stonehill Inn was Sildar Hallwinter, yes, but he had set up. He had set up kind of a spot to work at the Townmaster's Hall At a WeWork. There's a WeWork in the Townmaster's Hall.
Speaker 2:Okay, let's go with it. I'm just laughing because I'm looking at harvin wester's home and I immediately want to go and toss another egg at him terrible hate that guy burn it down I wish to do damage to his domicile with vicious mockery.
Speaker 1:Yes, absolutely, yes, absolutely, anyway, so you've got. So you already. You've talked to sister Gary L. Yeah, she wants you to go find the Banshee Agatha all along and ask her about.
Speaker 4:I haven't watched it. No spoilers, thank you, okay.
Speaker 1:No spoilers, we're not all the way through. We haven't finished it.
Speaker 2:Fable's the only one who's finished it.
Speaker 5:Have you watched all of Agatha all along. I can't watch anything because I have no time, but I obsessively read about it.
Speaker 1:I love Aubrey Plaza.
Speaker 4:I've heard so if you watch the whole thing, like if you binge it, are you having an Agathon? Just, I have a lot of questions yes, so that's your.
Speaker 1:That's one quest. I'm just gonna just keep going. I'm just gonna keep rolling with this.
Speaker 4:So you're killing me. That's why I went back into my quiet position away from the mic. It's like get in there. Boom Dropped a little grenade.
Speaker 1:Like a George Costanza Leave on a high note. Thank you, Ladies and gentlemen you're only remember.
Speaker 4:Try your waitress. Tip the veal.
Speaker 1:So other things, other things. Sildar still wants you to find Gundren right.
Speaker 2:Yes, okay. So we've got Banshee, we've got Gundren. Are we supposed to go after the spider?
Speaker 1:You're still, you're still looking for the spider. You know, you know the spider is somewhere. I don't know if you know exactly where.
Speaker 4:We knew that he was in Craig Ma Castle. We just don't know where Craig Ma Castle is.
Speaker 1:Well, you know, well, you know, the Craig Ma Goblins are at Craig Ma Castle, but you don't know where, where the spider is. Yet I don't believe oh, okay, I do have you just, you just know that he may be there, I believe, if I recall correctly, or what do you have? Okay, so you have a note on this I have notes.
Speaker 2:I mean literally. My notes are from june 1st, so we are talking six months yes, six all I wrote down was phan, delver pact and wave echo cave ah, the wave.
Speaker 1:Okay, so you did know about the wave echo cave. Okay, so I believe spider the spider is at the wave echo cave. However, I don't believe you yet know where the wave echo cave is correct so on the map. So on the map, the giant map in front of you of all of the whole area, will show you where the Wave Echo Cave is. However, it is unbeknownst to you.
Speaker 2:Only knownst to the map.
Speaker 4:Knownst on the map but unbeknownst to you and there's Agatha's lair all along. There it is. Do we have to walk down the witch's?
Speaker 1:road you do have to walk down the witch's is. Do we have to walk down the witch's road?
Speaker 2:You do have to walk down the witch's road. Do we have to sing about the?
Speaker 1:witch's road. There you have it. So you need to go down the witch's road, which I think is I don't know what is that on the. You have to go down the Tribor Trail, aka the Witch's Road to Agatha's Lair. You could talk to the town master if you want. He may have some.
Speaker 2:My best friend.
Speaker 1:Your best friend Carmen.
Speaker 2:Wester Love that guy.
Speaker 1:So there may be some other options on the job board. So if you're looking for things to do, there may be some jobs on the job board by the, by the town master's hall. If you're looking for other things to do, otherwise you have. You've got a couple things to do. You can go to the Cragmaw Castle and still be on the search for Gundren. You can go, especially Dal. You can figure out what the Banshee has for Dal. The Banshee has something, but you don't know what that is.
Speaker 2:I mean never split the party. So where Dal goes.
Speaker 1:I'm just saying that's more specific to Dal split it three ways. Let's do that. We will have multiple. It'll be like a Pulp Fiction kind of bouncing back and forth between all these stories and they will all somehow come together for one mega story. It will all come together in the end. I don't know how, but we'll see.
Speaker 4:Well, I have a player from the 80s who's still waiting for their turn to come back because they split the party.
Speaker 1:Fabulous.
Speaker 4:Yeah, they just decided and I'm like, okay, well, I'm going to handle this first.
Speaker 1:Nice.
Speaker 4:You didn't want to go the way you went.
Speaker 1:Okay, knock yourself out, all right, so. So, what would you all like to do? You've got, you've got your map of fan down. Where would you, where would you like to go first?
Speaker 4:Do? Should we just um? Oh, is there anything you want your staff to work on?
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, I forgot about those guys. Should we send them in?
Speaker 1:Yeah, what would you like to do?
Speaker 2:Should we maybe swing by the woods, check on Callie and get the goblins?
Speaker 3:over. Oh is Callie with us Okay.
Speaker 2:Should we maybe send the goblins over to Tresendermanor to have them start work?
Speaker 1:That's probably not a bad idea. I mean, now that you've laid claim to it, just make sure they're not wearing any red clothes Right?
Speaker 4:no, red clothes All right, because we have we get to the woods they're trying on. They have bolts of fabric, it's all red. We just lost the entire staff Because they made their own uniforms. We've all got uniforms.
Speaker 2:We've also got two wolves, fluffy and Bitsy. I forgot about Fluffy and Bitsy. Fluffy and Bitsy. Okay, so we have All right. So let's head out to the woods where the goblins are.
Speaker 1:Okay, fabulous, all right.
Speaker 2:And then we're going to get out there. So we've got Michael Creed, oscar Stanley, toby Nardog and Vincent. I'm going to have a little chat-ski with my staff here, right on it. I'm going to have a little chat ski with my staff here.
Speaker 5:Right on, hey guys how's? Everything going Great. Been a little while, been a long while. Sorry guys, there was a lot of work to do with the B&B, but I have great news.
Speaker 3:Going to send you guys in.
Speaker 5:I want you to get started on work. We have cleared the place out. There are no more bugbears. There are no more redbrands. If a redbrand shows up, direct them to.
Speaker 3:Sarnak the Nothic, Don't tell them?
Speaker 5:why Make sure they got their cape on Few notes for you guys Don't wear anything red or the Nothic is going to eat you. When you get there you can ask for Droop, who is also a goblin, or Theo Pimble, who I hate, but he works for me. For some reason. He used to be a redbrand, now he seems okay but keep an eye on him.
Speaker 3:Got it. I want you to put Fluffy and Bitsy outside.
Speaker 5:Okay, if a redbrand shows up, see if they can chase them off first, otherwise feed them to the no thick Got it.
Speaker 1:So we're supposed to feed the no thick.
Speaker 5:Yes, but only redbrands.
Speaker 1:Only redbrands.
Speaker 5:Yeah, or, if you can like, find something outside to feed it, just make sure he doesn't eat. You Got it.
Speaker 1:So we're not supposed to wear red, correct? Find something outside to feed it, just make sure he doesn't eat. You Got it. So we're not supposed to wear red, correct? Okay, so the one goblin starts taking off his underwear. He's got little red goblin boxers on, aw.
Speaker 5:Now he's Winnie the Pooh-ing it. Can somebody get that guy some pants? Who is that?
Speaker 1:Our dog who's working on uniforms?
Speaker 3:What are you guys? Nardog, nardog.
Speaker 5:Where are the uniforms? Nardog is both wearing the uniforms and taking off his underwear.
Speaker 1:No, no, Nardog is not the Vincent. Vincent is taking off his underwear.
Speaker 2:Oh, it's, vincent, Okay.
Speaker 1:Vincent is taking off his underwear because it's Vincent. Vincent is taking off his underwear Because it's red. It's always Vincent Fucking Vincent. Vincent's taking off his underwear. Nardog is busy sewing. He's had six months To sew uniforms, so he's got the uniforms.
Speaker 2:Six months We've left them out there for six months. We've left them out there for six months.
Speaker 1:We've left them out there for six months. They come back and there's a goblin city.
Speaker 2:They've taken wives. They're children.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, it's an encampment, so the goblins have been out there for not six months, but they've been out there for a while. Nardog is the tailor, so Nardog has been sewing costumes, uniforms, okay. So he quickly takes some measurements of Vincent and sews him up some pants.
Speaker 2:Okay, so Vincent is wearing pants again, vincent is decent once again. Okay.
Speaker 5:All right. So you guys are clear. Head to the Bumble, bumble, b&b.
Speaker 1:Yes, we got it. We got it, chief.
Speaker 5:Okay, I'm going to say that, oscar, you're in charge. Make sure everybody gets their tasks. Delegate. I don't want you all working on the same thing.
Speaker 1:Okay, what are our tasks?
Speaker 5:Okay, so we need to clean. There's a lot of blood in there right now. Okay, we need to start repairing Kind of a mess. Okay, you can put Theo Pimble on anything you want. Hate that guy got it, and don't let anybody get eaten by the. No, that who's not a bad guy got it.
Speaker 1:Okay, okay, okay, okay. I think I think I think I got that. Okay, do your best, I'll try.
Speaker 2:Okay, all right. So Okay, all right.
Speaker 1:So the, the, the, the hoard, not the hoard, but the, the, the, the, the, the fluffle of goblins seven goblins and two wolves the seven goblins, two wolves, all, all head down. And the seven goblins, two wolves, all head down, and a no thick in a tree, fabulous, they all head down. They come down into town, they head out the main road there toward Trescender Manor, aka the Bumble Bumble.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's not Trescender Manor anymore.
Speaker 1:No, it is the future home of, is it? Are we just calling it the bumble, bumble b&b now, I mean it is the bumble bumble okay, it's the bumble bumble b&b, I think. So okay, okay, excellent, so they're, they're all headed that way. Um, and they will, they will begin construction now. They don't have. I mean, how are they? How are they getting supplies, I guess?
Speaker 2:we're gonna have to. I don't want to do this, but I feel like I have to make theo pimble like the foreman theo pimble will be the foreman.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay, so theo will hate that guy you want to give him. Give him kind of a a sack of of money. Yes, all right, hold on let me see what I've got.
Speaker 2:A sack of money, yes. All right, hold on. Let me see what I've got in terms of money.
Speaker 1:Bring the sack back.
Speaker 2:All right, so I have a hacky sack. All right, so I have a total of 78 gold pieces. Okay, it's all inclusive.
Speaker 1:You know what that means.
Speaker 2:Yes, michael pieces.
Speaker 1:okay, it's all inclusive, um you know what?
Speaker 2:that means I mean yes michael.
Speaker 1:Um, I'm gonna give him, I'm gonna give him 65 of them so that I have something on me. 65 gold, yeah, to get the supplies, yeah, cleaning supplies, yeah, paint lumber feed themselves food, etc. So he's he's in charge of. Theo pimble is the treasurer aka foreman. Um, okay, so he's, he's got all them organized, okay, excellent all right, so we did that.
Speaker 2:So now we need to figure out what we want to do next. Do we want to go see agatha down the witch's road? I mean, fable just perked up, so I feel like that's what we want to do next.
Speaker 5:Do we want to go see Agatha down the witch's road? I mean, fable just perked up, so I feel like that's what we should do next.
Speaker 2:We are getting something, possibly from the witch's road.
Speaker 5:She also might have information for us. Yeah, that'd be good to have as we go to crack.
Speaker 2:I think probably. Yes, james is nodding. Yeah, I think so. Yes, james is nodding. Yeah, I think so. On this audio podcast now, we're all nodding yes, we'll put that in the transcript, nodding also, we've had this quest for like a long ass time and we just haven't done it yet yeah so let's go down down the witch's road. Down the road, we're easing on. Down the road. Yes, down the road, the witch's road.
Speaker 1:Ease on down. Ease on down the road, Excellent.
Speaker 2:Oh, don't worry, when we get there, I'm pretty sure Agatha's going to look exactly like Aubrey Plaza.
Speaker 1:Okay, so that is going to be where you're going to head, to Agatha's lair. So let's see, so you're going from Fandalen to and that's quite a distance. Well, don't worry, we're dancing and singing 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40, 45, 50, 55, 60. That's about 60 miles. Oh wow, 60 miles away.
Speaker 2:We're really easing on down the road 60 or 60?, 60, 6-0.
Speaker 1:And you only go about 24 miles per day.
Speaker 4:So this is about like a three day, three day journey.
Speaker 1:If you haven't I know, I know you just leveled up. Make sure you've taken a long rest for your characters and everything. Make sure you're full, full HP at this point.
Speaker 2:Oh what could that possibly mean?
Speaker 5:That means we're going to have a nice easy trip, no problems at all.
Speaker 1:All right, so let's see.
Speaker 2:Wait, where do I do that?
Speaker 1:There should be a button button in the upper right that says long rest At the top, you know where you see her picture.
Speaker 5:It's in that row Boom.
Speaker 1:Nailed it, James Nailed it.
Speaker 5:Okay.
Speaker 1:All right. So let's see On day one of your travels. Let's see what happens. Day one of your travels is uneventful, Yay.
Speaker 4:Night falls, you take a hundred points of damage. That's right. Day breaks A hundred points more.
Speaker 1:Let's see what happens on day two of your journey to Agatha's lair. Another fun, uneventful day. You are just easing down the road.
Speaker 2:We're such great traveling companions. We're having so much fun.
Speaker 1:Moving right along, I was going to say. I was going to say, oh, moving right along, but loose and fancy free. Yes, exactly, easing down the road, moving right along, having a great time.
Speaker 2:Violating copyright left and right.
Speaker 1:Ooh, you, just you, you on day three. Oh, that was me Sorry.
Speaker 2:How dare you?
Speaker 1:On day three.
Speaker 2:What happens on day three.
Speaker 1:Everybody give me a perception check.
Speaker 2:Oh crap, I have Doctor who dice I'm going to give this one its first roll 19.
Speaker 4:The inaugural roll 14.
Speaker 1:Did you add any modifiers to that?
Speaker 2:Yes, I added Hold on, excellent. Do I have a perception? Perception oh, 15 then 15, 14, 19.
Speaker 1:So you're going down the Tribor Trail.
Speaker 2:Arms linked skipping.
Speaker 1:Yes, To your right are the mountains the Sword Mountains. To your right are the mountains the sword mountains. To your left is a forest the edge of your— I'll take swords for a thousand dollars, that's S-words To your left is the edge of Neverwinter Wood. You hear some rustling in the trees and in the brush of the Neverwinter Wood you feel like you're being watched.
Speaker 5:Anybody else feel like we're being watched? Anybody else feel like we're being watched? You made a yummy sound I mean I had a pudding and a biscuit today, so yay pudding and a biscuit.
Speaker 1:That is sounds british, it does put the pudding on the biscuit, no taste the biscuit. No Taste the biscuit, oh no. So you hear, you hear rustling in the, in the brush and in the trees of of the Neverwinter wood, but as, as you go along, nothing, nothing happens, and oh.
Speaker 4:Tempted to tell russell to get out of the tree and go home. Yeah, I know seriously, russell. What's the problem, dude, climbing trees?
Speaker 2:russell, stop following us, russell.
Speaker 1:Alright, so you get to. You get to Coneyberry, which is where Agatha is. The town of Coneyberry has been abandoned for years and lies in ruins. The Tribor trail runs through the abandoned town, providing an easy landmark for locating the lair of the Banshee Agatha. From the ruins of Coneyberry, an old trail leads northwest into Neverwinter Wood. Yes, would you like to? Would you like to head up that trail?
Speaker 4:yeah, why not? Let's do it, let's mix it up.
Speaker 2:I think you do do we, let's trail mix it up? I don't know. If you tell me we do, then I don't know if we do.
Speaker 4:I think we should follow the suspicious trail, see if there's some trail mix at the end. Why do I feel like?
Speaker 5:this is another situation that we're going to have to bail him out of.
Speaker 1:No, that is when you magically conjure the spirit Spotify and you have your trail mix Spirit.
Speaker 2:Spotify and you have your trail mix.
Speaker 4:Which I cast.
Speaker 2:Thaumaturgy. Which, if it's Iquium, oh my god which? If it's Iquium, it's just all Rick Astley.
Speaker 1:Various versions of Rickrolling.
Speaker 4:That's what the phantom sound is going to be in the background, that is that is how you destroy Agatha.
Speaker 1:I guess they got Rick rolled. What is? What's the what's that? What's the spell of? Uh, it definitely has the sound and the sound in the ears. Now there's like, uh, not told the dad, just a little's like a not toll the dead. Dissonant whispers, dissonant whispers.
Speaker 4:Oh, I have that still, I'm ready, I'm ready to use it, and it's always. Rick Astley.
Speaker 1:Absolutely so. As you, as you go up this trail, the forest grows dark and still.
Speaker 2:Is it nighttime or is it just getting dark?
Speaker 1:Well, the trees are so thick and, ah yes, the trail winds deeper into the trees.
Speaker 4:Some thick wood baby. Oh sorry, oh oh.
Speaker 1:Oh, into the woods, into the woods and out of the woods. Heavy vines and thick layers of moss drape the branches and the air is noticeably colder than it was in the ruined village.
Speaker 2:When we set up this table and Fable and I sat across from each other. That was a bad plan.
Speaker 5:Cahoots, always cahoots. I hate that game.
Speaker 1:After rounding a bend in the trail, you come upon a domed shelter made from the warped bowing branches of nearby trees. A low doorway leads inside.
Speaker 5:I knock on the door.
Speaker 3:Guys, we've been walking for three days.
Speaker 5:I'm knocking on the door.
Speaker 2:Pause for dramatic effect.
Speaker 1:I'm reading, bear with me.
Speaker 4:I mean.
Speaker 5:Is a bear with you what?
Speaker 4:Agatha clearly chose the bear over the man, so Agatha chose the bear.
Speaker 2:Oh, Fable's sick of our shit. Yeah is that why you took the headphones off? You want Excedrin.
Speaker 4:It's because some of those jokes caused psychic damage.
Speaker 1:I know Seriously.
Speaker 2:Oh boy, is that a no to Excedrin? I'm fine for now, okay, okay.
Speaker 1:So you knock on the door.
Speaker 5:Yes.
Speaker 1:Door creaks open slowly. There's just a crack now in the door. You can see a little bit of light, pale light, flickering kind of in the background there and you hear foolish mortals.
Speaker 3:What do you want here? Do you not know?
Speaker 4:it is death to seek me out what I'm going to uh, oh god, I'm going to cast thaumaturgy what does that one do again? Yeah, it's going to. Uh, basically, I'm going to create a phantom sound inside and it's going to be the sound of like little birds twittering and and like little happy music you're trying to cheer her up yes just something absurd next I do a little dance hi, honey, we're home.
Speaker 1:So you're casting thaumaturgy.
Speaker 4:I cast thaumaturgy.
Speaker 1:And why are you doing that?
Speaker 4:What are you doing?
Speaker 1:with that.
Speaker 4:I'm creating a phantom sound inside the house and I'm just playing like little birds chirping and little happy music, kind of accompanied rainbows and unicorns, something that's cheerful in this dark place.
Speaker 1:You hear a very foolish man. Yes loud scream from the banshee and the door shuts nice equilibrium and the door shuts, Nice Equium. I think we have opens briefly again and you just see the glowing eyes of the banshee.
Speaker 3:Hi, what is it you want?
Speaker 5:Well, so Sister Cariel sent us. She said we should talk to you.
Speaker 3:I know that you seek many things. Ask me one question and I will give you an answer. Oh crap.
Speaker 2:One question what's our one question?
Speaker 5:Oh.
Speaker 2:I don't know if I have this Fables deep in thought. I wrote notes.
Speaker 5:Okay, okay.
Speaker 2:So one question.
Speaker 3:One question.
Speaker 5:Are you willing to trade for something valuable?
Speaker 3:What is it you seek?
Speaker 5:Great question.
Speaker 2:Do we want information and if so, what information do we want?
Speaker 5:Well, because in my notes it says I have a silver comb that she would probably like and I should trade with her.
Speaker 2:Okay, but we don't know what we should be trading for.
Speaker 4:But you have the quest to go and find the bench.
Speaker 5:Yes, and I have this silver comb to trade with her, but we're wondering what we trade it for.
Speaker 4:Ah, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 1:So what would you like to do with the comb?
Speaker 5:I'd like you to hold your horses.
Speaker 1:I can do that. Thank you, horses being held. Thank you.
Speaker 1:I will give you a little bit of background. So, sister Gary, I'll send you. Thank you. Horse is being held. Thank you, I will. I will give you a little bit of background. So, sister Gary, I'll send you on this quest. Yes, gave you the comb to trade for something. She would. Sister Gary, I wasn't clear as to what it was you were trading for. However, because because the, the Banshee, will not just give you something for free. Yeah, that's why I have the comb, right, exactly so, in order to to potentially get something from the Banshee, you probably have to give the Banshee something, hence the comb. So what would you like to do? Take out the comb, Perhaps?
Speaker 4:Okay, so how do you do that? So, oh, I apologize to the banshee and I was only trying to bring spring into her home and and I and I was. I thought I was being respectful and apparently I was not, because you shut the door on us and it's obvious to me and I apologize. We think we're looking for information, but we're not quite clear and they have something to trade you for information. Would you consider that?
Speaker 5:Take out the silver comb, but I'm not giving it to her.
Speaker 2:yet you can just see the comb in my hand.
Speaker 1:You see a flash of interest on Agatha's face.
Speaker 2:The door creaks open slightly more when you bring out this comb slightly more when you bring out this comb, would you trade us for the information that Sister Ariel sought for this comb? Would you be willing to trade information?
Speaker 1:There's a long pause. This creepy kind of ghastly hand reaches out. This creepy kind of ghastly hand reaches out. Give her the comb. You put the comb in the hand, the hand comes back back through the door.
Speaker 3:You seek the spellbook.
Speaker 2:Sure, yeah, yeah, obviously. What else did we seek?
Speaker 3:I no longer have the spell book. I traded it A dark necromancer named Sarnoff Smirnoff.
Speaker 1:Smirnoff.
Speaker 3:Sarnoff.
Speaker 4:It's not Yakos.
Speaker 1:No, no, I'm afraid not what is happening.
Speaker 3:Sarenath lives in Eriabor.
Speaker 1:I don't think you'll find that on the map.
Speaker 2:Do we have to climb a beanstalk?
Speaker 3:This was over a hundred years ago, oh good lord.
Speaker 5:The hell. You gave up that comb for nothing. Don't mind me. You gave up that comb for nothing. Don't mind me, got anything else for us to?
Speaker 3:go on. I don't know what became of the book after that.
Speaker 4:That was 100 years ago.
Speaker 3:More than 100 years ago.
Speaker 4:Was Van Dahlen Harry Moore.
Speaker 5:Harry.
Speaker 3:Moore, you have asked your one question.
Speaker 5:People with the thumbs down don't shruggy us shruggy I wish I had minor illusion.
Speaker 4:I'd leave a Yelp review.
Speaker 1:Would not recommend Zero stars.
Speaker 2:Zero out of ten Took my stuff gave me nothing.
Speaker 1:Gave me useless information.
Speaker 4:Really 100 years old. Somebody's got to get with the times.
Speaker 1:So what do you do?
Speaker 4:I mean, I don't know. Are you sure she's telling?
Speaker 5:the truth. Insight check.
Speaker 1:You'd like to give an insight? Check Okay.
Speaker 4:That would be a 12.
Speaker 2:Should we all try, yes, 18.
Speaker 3:Oh 19.
Speaker 5:Oh, oh.
Speaker 1:You will leave Agatha to be entirely truthful.
Speaker 2:Entirely truthful and entirely useless.
Speaker 1:You find her to be entirely truthful and that the spell book that apparently Sister Gariel had been seeking out is no longer in Agatha's possession and was given to this necromancer, Serenath, an Eriabor. So Serenath is T-S-E-R-N-O-T-H.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's not how I spelled it.
Speaker 1:T-S-E-R-N-O-H and Eriabor is I-R-I-R-I-A-E-B-O-R-M-O-U-S-E. Can I do?
Speaker 4:a history check.
Speaker 1:What would you, what would you like to check with your history check?
Speaker 4:I'm not so great at history, but I would check to see if I know where or it doesn't sound familiar to you, however, um, it is again.
Speaker 1:she was truthful, so it's she what? She wasn't making up the name of this town, but it is just not. It's not as a town, city, village, whatever familiar to familiar to you and your travels you have. You have not heard it before.
Speaker 4:But what?
Speaker 1:we do know is that, don't?
Speaker 4:we know that Finn Dillon was find that out early on and Dillon had been kind of abandoned.
Speaker 5:It was Abandoned.
Speaker 1:It was a frontier outpost, it was. Yeah, it was it's kind of a new outpost on an old place.
Speaker 5:Okay, you don't know what it was prior to we don't know what it was.
Speaker 1:We don't Right.
Speaker 4:We just know that it was a new. It's a new frontier town, right On an old.
Speaker 1:Right, Got it Okay. So now you've now you've got this information from From Agatha.
Speaker 2:This useless information.
Speaker 1:Well, someone was looking for this information.
Speaker 2:Oh, so go back to sister Gary L.
Speaker 1:Perhaps, perhaps you might want to go back to sister Gary L and relay the the seemingly useless information.
Speaker 2:Okay, 60 miles.
Speaker 1:Three days journey back.
Speaker 4:I would walk 60 miles. I would walk 60 more, just to be the man that knocks up on the banshee's door.
Speaker 2:That's all I had to say. That was very good, thank you.
Speaker 1:You've got three days journey, very uneventful, back to the town of fandalen. Okay, so what would you like to do?
Speaker 2:well, we made it back to sister gary, ells quest so I guess we we're gonna knock on her door now.
Speaker 5:Sorry, I jumped the gun. You're almost in sync my bad A little different. Is she not answering?
Speaker 4:I'd knock again.
Speaker 2:Yeah let's knock again.
Speaker 5:All right, is she not answering, I'd knock again.
Speaker 1:Yeah, let's knock again what the door opens? And it's Sister Gariel.
Speaker 2:Wow, oh my God, I know no way.
Speaker 1:Yowza she says oh my goodness.
Speaker 5:Where have you all been? We've been busy. Had to take over my B&B. You're welcome to visit wonderful.
Speaker 1:When? When are you opening?
Speaker 5:yeah, that's tbd I'll be sure to write it on a sign outside grand opening.
Speaker 1:It might look like blood, but it's really just a red marker fabulous I I can't wait wait, what news do you bring me?
Speaker 5:To Agatha's lair and we traded this. Yes, and apparently she gave away the spell book Over 100 years ago To a dark necromancer. Serenal and he lives in a town necromancer named Cyrano and he lives in a town called Kiribar.
Speaker 1:Close enough. So you've explained all this information to Sister Gariel, sister G, thank you, thank you. Thank you so much for providing this information. You have truly shown that you are a special individual. You're quite welcome. I am a member of what is known as the Harpers.
Speaker 4:What's that? Is Valerie still your president? Oh, sorry, I gave myself psychic damage. Oh.
Speaker 1:Would you like to roll a history check?
Speaker 3:I'll try.
Speaker 4:That's just for Fable to know who Valerie Harper is.
Speaker 1:Not Valerie the Harpers. You got a 10? Close enough I got a 14. So the Harpers are spellcasters and spies who covertly oppose any abuse of power, magical or otherwise. Working alone or in small cells, they gather information throughout Faerun, analyze the political dynamics in each region or realm and use what they uncover to help the weak, the poor and the oppressed. From behind the scenes, harpers act openly only as a last resort. I would like to invite you to become one of the Harpers and help us. Are you willing?
Speaker 5:Sure.
Speaker 1:Wonderful. You must not reveal this to anyone other than fellow Harpers. What about us?
Speaker 5:We're still here. No, you're not hearing Harpers. What about us? We're still here.
Speaker 1:No, you're not hearing this conversation. What you don't hear this conversation? Where am I? You're standing far enough away that you can't hear.
Speaker 3:How about me?
Speaker 1:fine, you can hear, so anyway, you must not tell anyone. The only way that people will know that you are part of this organization is if you wear this pin.
Speaker 2:Ooh, there's an actual Harper's pin. There's an actual pin I.
Speaker 5:I can have her in like at least six months. Did something happen? What Nothing.
Speaker 1:What For the last six months for us to not meet? Yeah, did something happen? What Nothing. What it's for the last six months for us to not meet?
Speaker 2:Yeah, did something happen.
Speaker 1:I don't know what you're talking about. What?
Speaker 5:I'll just put it on or sit for now.
Speaker 1:That's fine. So so you are now a member of the Harpers, so just keep that in mind in case cause you may be called upon again to to assist To harp. Yes, that's, that's what you do. You have it's like a drum circle, but you all play harps. It's like a harp circle.
Speaker 2:Sounds really crunchy, getting all over here yes, off the rails.
Speaker 4:By the way, a little harp trivia. Ireland is the only country that has a harp on its flag or as a symbol Fascinating.
Speaker 1:I did not know that. Good to see now. Now I feel like I'm so well educated now the more you know Fabulous. So what would you like to? So fantastic, so you provided the information to Sister Gariel. She is very thankful for your help. She has invited you to join the Harpers, so that is also very exciting. What would you all like to do next? Do you want to pause there? Because I mean so where would you want to go back? To the Stonehill Inn?
Speaker 2:Are we just checking on?
Speaker 1:you want to. You want to talk to Sildar.
Speaker 4:Yeah, let's talk to Sildar.
Speaker 1:Maybe see what he has to say for himself, maybe he's gotten some gossip, the hot he's got the hot gas in in Fandale.
Speaker 2:And since you've been gone, since you've been gone still there's got his finger on the pulse yeah, yeah, stonehill in his down looks like hot topic.
Speaker 1:That's right, all right. So you, you head into. You head into the stonehill inn. Sildar. Sildar is sitting there at a table having a having a pint of of ale and um, what would you like to do?
Speaker 5:um.
Speaker 4:What would you like to do?
Speaker 1:I'll sit down with him. Sildar, it's good to see that you're up and around. Equium, my friend, how are you? How are you, my feeble, feeble-boned friend? Really, you are you, my feeble, feeble, boned friend really you think you should call me feeble? You still owe me money, wow god, sildar is mean yeah he says, he says it with all, all the love all the love of somebody's life was saved by us Too, true Too true.
Speaker 4:Barely Sildar. What, what do you? What do you know, what do you hear?
Speaker 1:Well, have you? Have you found Gundren yet?
Speaker 4:Have not found Gundren. Uh, we just had a conversation with a Banshee, um, rather interesting. Um, we've, we've dealt with some things, uh, dealt with some more red brands and that. But, uh, wondering, since you've been here, what have you heard?
Speaker 1:Have you heard any news of Gundert Cause? I have not, well as as as some of the red brands were running out of town Oops, I heard them talking about the goblins and I overheard that perhaps.
Speaker 5:Gundren might be at Cragmaw Castle. Do you know?
Speaker 1:what Cragmaw Castle? Do you know what Cragmaw Castle is? Cragmaw Castle, the ruins of Cragmaw Castle, are in the Neverwinterwood Just north of the Tribor Trail. They're on the southern end of the Neverwinter Wood, but you might be able to find Gundren or more about Gundren and what's going on there.
Speaker 5:I feel like that's the first useful piece of information we've gotten all day. Thank you.
Speaker 4:My Yelp review. You'll get better than the Banshee.
Speaker 1:Very kind of you, we're good.
Speaker 5:Don't forget to knock off a point, because he owes you money.
Speaker 1:Fair, that's fair.
Speaker 4:Four and a half out of five.
Speaker 1:Four and a half out of five. Can you give half stars? You can only give whole stars.
Speaker 4:If you want to talk about it, I can take the full point off. I don't care.
Speaker 1:You should take a full point off. Money's important these days. If he owes you money, the least he can do is pay you back. Alright, so for next time we will head to Kragmaw Castle it won't be in six months either it will not be in six months, no, but we will go to Kragmaw Castle in the ever long search for Gundren Rockseeker or information on Gundren.
Speaker 2:Seeking Gundren Rockseeker.
Speaker 1:Seeking Gundren. Rockseeker will be the name of next time's episode, Actually yeah, thaumaturgy.
Speaker 4:Maybe I should get a boom box and just stand outside of Cragmaw Castle.
Speaker 2:Gundren.
Speaker 1:Absolutely In your eyes the light that oh, no wait, not us.
Speaker 2:Oh good, More copyright infringement.
Speaker 1:So you and Lloyd Dobler, how did that happen? So you and Gunter and Rockseeker, how did that happen? Anyway, all right, thank you all for enduring this adventure. We're sorry, huh, we're sorry, don't be sorry. That was fun. So, to recap, we did a recap, we leveled up your characters and then we got to. We at least got to find the Banshee with with relatively useless information as far as we were concerned. But Sister Gariel seemed happy. So, um, so that was nice. Um hung out at the, the Stonehill Inn, reconnected with Sildar, and he provided some additional information on where to hopefully find Gundren at the Cragmaw Castle.
Speaker 2:And Dal is a Harper.
Speaker 1:And Dal is a Harper. How exciting is that? I'm currently editing. Are you drawing the pen? Yeah, nice, let's see. Let's take a look, I'm. I'm taking it off the internet, so it's not really drawing. Well, let's see. I want to see what you find.
Speaker 3:Oh cool, ooh wow.
Speaker 1:I don't know where it's going yet Got it. That's pretty cool I have a question. Yes.
Speaker 4:Now that you're a Harper technically, can you change your name a little bit and be Dallery Harper?
Speaker 5:Oh my, God, I don't understand it. I'm going to say no.
Speaker 2:There's an actress named Valerie Harper.
Speaker 4:That's the whole bit, the whole joke.
Speaker 2:Dallery Harper, dallery Harper, I'm actress named valerie harper. That's, that's, that's the whole bit.
Speaker 1:the whole joke, dalory harper.
Speaker 4:Oh my god, that's amazing, it's probably better that you don't know, because that way it's not as painful right man, valerie harper, died in 2019 rip spoilers it's beeners. It's been five years.
Speaker 1:It's been five years since Valerie died, wow.
Speaker 3:Wow, too soon, too soon, wow, she'll get a chain of Rota Rota.
Speaker 1:Right. Wasn't Valerie Harper Rota? Was she Rota? I think she was, I don't remember.
Speaker 2:Rota Morgenstern. Yeah, because she was on Mary Tyler Moore, right? Yes, rota Morgenstern.
Speaker 1:Oh, my goodness. Okay, on that note, thank you everybody for for enduring this episode. Take a long rest. You're going to need it for the next episode. Hang in there, we will. We will see you soon. Thank you so much. Bye, bye, thank you.
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